91 lines
4.0 KiB
Plaintext
91 lines
4.0 KiB
Plaintext
*goes off on universities for 10 minutes*
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~"self authoring program increases likelihood of men to stay in university"~
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"I'm contributing to the problem!"
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https://youtu.be/vwKCK5EhibM?si=QvzrbmCUijVkwCCz
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~"if you're not suffering yet, all you have to do is wait"~
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~9:00 "hell is a bottomless pit... it's reasonably probable that you're that idiot"
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https://youtu.be/j0GL_4cAkhI?si=6NwQQx_M8KQZaM5j
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~4-5:00 prager says peterson is a good man, Peterson refuses to admit he's good, then says roundaboutly that he does things that are "somewhat approximating good"
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43:00 "i live in a constant state of disbelief"
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"don't worry about that, it was only 200"
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"who in the world would come to hear me tell you what I told you"
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46:00 "'this was our anniversary present' you people are out of your minds!"
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https://youtu.be/pZKuwgcKXwY?si=LHNUqPH_aOEDu8iK
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1:21:00 "how many shots to the head did you have to take before you thought being a stand up comedian was a good idea?
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---
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story where he was gonna get in a fight and his mom chose not to intervene "yeah mom and because of you, I think I already lost"
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---
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https://youtu.be/JpA5iDpnrbw?si=j1HPXvELczHDMEuK
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~14:30 gender, sex, so that's already 70 different things... "that'd be funny if it wasn't true"
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"bilbo... or was it frodo? doesn't really matter, it's one of those little hobbits anyways" - he can seriously NEVER remember their names!!
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~"so, back to x... I might manage this..."~
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"an eagle can see a dime from the top of the empire state building. although why an eagle would be interested in that isn't obvious to me."
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~"if you have 98% seller rating on ebay, you're a crook, we need better than that"~
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---
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basically anytime he says "I'm serious!" "I'm dead serious about that." cuz that's when he accidentally makes people laugh
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---
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53:59
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*carrot chopping noises* EXCELLENT joke
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1:15:45 "so you're nonbinary. so now what? I'm dead serious about that"
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"let's say you're straight and you're heterosexual. wait, those are the same things."
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1:21:31 "you'd never guess this from my past... all my interactions... are positive"
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"maybe he's half civilized at this point"
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https://youtu.be/R4vXeTx0i-E?si=1w7ShJN9a-27_uCE&t=356
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woman "my husband and I agreed that we would do whatever you say"
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woman mocking husband "i told you so"
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9:34 "you seem to think they're a bunch of whiners."
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"oh, I think it's true!"
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"we're all here, and we're all peaceful - at the moment -"
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14:30 crowdwork moment but I didn't quite hear it
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https://youtu.be/6bHX5W55Fdw?si=i1-bzVys0GMMjkGj&t=221
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arrogant chat "it's almost as arrogant as adam's was stupid"
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"look... buddy." "being God and all"
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"delivered by God... it's hard to argue with"
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https://youtu.be/S0P6H7cm0E4?si=i5BbqjRDJdFkvq24&t=1966
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"to see what happens, and I certainly saw what happened"
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https://youtu.be/R-z92l0kPls?si=XxZpYBi0c_0d5jEl&t=720
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nietzche's most arrogant statement yet again
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"that's no good, thinking about things"
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"rats, they're not much like human beings... but that's wrong... some of you probably more than that!"
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~25:00 dude whose roommate was elon musk, full story
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https://youtu.be/dPv1RYsi7sA?si=Ag8nrvCXgqAjC5Cl&t=1404
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possibly best delivery for the elon musk breakdown cuz punchline
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"turns out the pollution was really good for the fish"
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59:16 "non competitive monopoly"
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"the wall wasn't on fire before he showed up"
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"an anti-plumber"
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this entire plumber bit is great
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then the plumber gangs and the tattooed massage therapists
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"lobsters for everyone"
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1:34:30 smoke a blunt on stage? "it's still illegal here isn't it?" one guy said no "yes it is, yes it is"
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best aussie accent "no way, I'm not doing that"
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"wife, poof! what the hell did you bring me to this island for?"
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https://youtu.be/Q_zjdmkou0Q?si=pUBMK_vNPdciPQOf&t=1624
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guy staring directly back at you
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"you don't want them to be up to anything"
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~30:00 lol simon says
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https://youtu.be/Q_zjdmkou0Q?si=EodAeWivvjyx4cwa&t=3450
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the hockey game bit "a good goal will do it"
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https://youtu.be/Q_zjdmkou0Q?si=SfIpc2uw4jeR5eVN&t=5299
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"sam would win objectively but I would win metaphysically" |